Sunday, July 21, 2013

Heart Eyes and Feet

I don't post about my faith for the most part. If you know me, you know how imperfect I am and how many things I do that don't match up to what people might expect from a Christian. Just bear with me, though, I have something that I need to share that is punching me very hard right now. Today's sermon given by guest speaker Tae Shin, really convicted me that I needed to post. He spoke about Psalm 131:1. This is the verse from the New International Version of the Bible:
My heart is not proud, Lord,
    my eyes are not haughty;
I do not concern myself with great matters
    or things too wonderful for me.

Pastor Shin's point was that while on the way to Jerusalem, on the way up the hill, King David sang this song of "pre-worship" stating that his heart was not proud, his eyes were not looking down on others, and his feet were focused on getting to worship and not concerned about other things. Pastor Shin's point was that King David was praising and worshiping God on the way to worship. It reminded me of the verse our MOPS president had shared at last week's steering meeting, 1 Chronicles 16:10:
10 Glory in his holy name;
    let the hearts of those who seek the Lord rejoice.
What struck me, what I felt God was telling me, was that I need to look at my life and thank him. THANK him for my body. If you have seen me at any point this past week, you will know why this has been difficult for me. I could barely walk because of a personal training session last Saturday that was more akin to an hour of boot camp. Given that the personal trainer was an Army Ranger for 15 years, I think that was his intention. My legs wouldn't work properly and it was not until Wednesday that I could walk in a somewhat straight line. I felt pain all over my body. Of course, most of this pain was my own fault since I wanted to prove to him that this overweight, out-of-shape body could handle it. My pride as a past NCAA college athlete and marathon runner made it impossible for me to tell him that I couldn't handle the weights with which he had me work.

The verse from my MOPS president and watching CNN yesterday at the gym while I tortured myself even more came together with Pastor Shin's message today to strike me like a blow to the face. I need to be thankful for my body, as broken as it is, because this body is ALIVE. Trayvon Martin is dead. A young man who had been talking with his friend a few minutes before his death is no longer in this world to feel whether his body is in pain or not. So I need to be grateful. For this chance to make my body stronger, for the fact that I get to wake up in the morning, for God who gives me everything that I need when I need it.

I'm sure you didn't think that was where this post was going. But I have been screaming on the inside ever since I heard about the verdict because it just doesn't make any sense to me. How can GZ (I don't even want to give power to that man by writing his name) be NOT GUILTY? Trayvon Martin was not perfect, but GZ had no right to take his life. If you think your life is in danger and you happen to have a gun, why not shoot someone in the leg or the arm? Why do you shoot to kill? 

I'm going to follow up this post with another one addressing why I think the legal issues have been screwed up in this case. Can we continue to do nothing and let the kind of fear that killed Trayvon Martin run rampant? My Heart Eyes and Feet need to do something about it. I thank God for my body and my brain and my ability to take action. I praise God for the pain I feel because it helped me realize how great it is that I can feel pain. I wish Trayvon Martin could feel this pain.

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